Opening the Box (Proceed with Caution)

In a time where abortions are an everyday norm and aborted fetuses are picked through and sold for parts, this blog called, Opening the Box (Proceed with Caution) from a dear friend in Colorado is a refreshingly beautiful picture of the sanctity of life, the simple faith of the redeemed, and the loving grace of a God who is sovereign and good.

Read the beautiful words of a heart exposed, which reveals the faithfulness and glory of God in the sufferings and joys of this life.  I pray that you will read this blog and that it will warm, encourage, and remind your heart of steadfast truth.  If this blog blesses you, share it with others who may have experienced loss, need to be reminded of the beauty of life, even in the womb, or need assurances that God is indeed good and working throughout our sufferings and our greatest joys.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you; I appointed you a prophet to the nations.”  Jeremiah 1:5

Following God Even When You Struggle

Following the river where ever it takes me.

Last night my wife and I sat down to dinner and talked about a calling to international missions in Spain.  We talked about our friends who our there, the people group we are going there to reach, and where our hearts are right now.  As we examined our own hearts, we realized that we have a long way to go in our walk with Jesus.  There are so many things we need to be doing and we always feel we could be closer to the Lord.  The thing that I have been realizing lately is that many people in many different stations of life including missions, ministry, and lay ministry feel exactly the same way.  The fact is that each Christian is a sinner saved by grace and each one of us will have our failures, temptations, and weaknesses in our Christian walk.

The real question is does this make us any less a child of God or any less able to serve as a child of God?  Well if our Christianity relied on our works or a consistently perfect relationship with Jesus, then I would say that many of us would be ineligible for in service for the kingdom of God and in imminent danger of hell.  The beauty of Jesus Christ is that our salvation rest solely on His actions.  We have been saved because He died with our sins on Himself and then rose again with the keys to hell because He lived a sinless life.  Our only input into the equation, is our repentance and acceptance of the salvation Jesus offers us.  "For God so loved the world that He sent His only begotten Son so that whosoever believed in Him would have everlasting life."  John 3:16.    

So our Christian walks are completely hinged on the powerful works of Jesus.  Paul put it this way in Galatians 2:20, "I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me."  Knowing this we can walk in strength because Jesus lives in us.  When we walk in Christ and fully trust in the grace He has imparted to us, we are able to find strength in our daily walk with Him.  In John 15:5 Jesus say, "I am the vine, you are the branches; he that abides in me, and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit; for without me you can do nothing."  Even our love comes only from Him as is shown in 1 John 4:19, which says, "we love because God first loved us."

I hope that each of you will know that even in your struggles and failures, Jesus is still with you.  Each of us struggle with sin and temptation every day.  Even Paul, arguably one of the greatest evangelist in human history struggled with his daily walk, which is evidenced by Romans 7 where Paul firmly establishes his own wretched nature and inability to overcome the sin within himself.  Paul does not end with his wretchedness though he continues on into Romans 8 where we see the saving and transforming power of Jesus in us.  I love Paul's conclusion at the end of chapter 8 saying, "Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, or distress, or persecution, or famine, or nakedness, or danger, or sword?  As it is written,

“For your sake we are being killed all the day long;
    we are regarded as sheep to be slaughtered.”

No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.  For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord."

I say all this because the Lord is teaching me that He can use me for great things even with all my imperfections.  I, as a follower of Jesus, can no longer use the failings of my flesh as a reason I can't answer God's calling on my life.  None of us are perfect!  Yet through God's enormous grace, He still uses us for great things in His kingdom if we are faithful.  If the Lord is burdening your heart for a ministry (local, career, international, or otherwise) today, I hope you will find the courage and faith to accept His calling on your life today.  Trust Him who is faithful to give you everything you need to accomplish what He calls you to.  Stand up in faith and walk boldly for Jesus today, no matter where He leads you.  I leave you with the words of John saying, "For everyone who has been born of God overcomes the world. And this is the victory that has overcome the world— our faith.  Who is it that overcomes the world except the one who believes that Jesus is the Son of God?"

Blessings,

Greg

Stop Believing the Lie

I recommended this blog post, by my wife, to everyone and yet I just discovered that most of you who viewed my blog chose not to read her blog.  I believe that this blog my wife wrote needs to be read by every believer in Jesus Christ.  If you did not chose to check out this blog last time, I hope you will choose to read it tonight.  Blessings

This whole blog may be long and a little messy - I just have so much rolling in my head right now.  So much has happened.  I have to share it.  I can't just pray, I can't just journal.  It begs to be shared.

For over two years now I have felt a disconnect in my faith.  I have wondered about what Christ has really done for me that I should share him with others, what are the real differences among those in the trinity, what does a Christ-centered life really look like, do people really come to Jesus anymore, do I know him and does he know me, am I really saved at all and from what, and two years ago I had the scariest of all these questions pounding me in the face - God, Jesus, the Holy Spirit - does He really even exist or have I been believing a lie...

I have been seeking - oh, Lord, have I been seeking - but where have I sought the answers?

I've turned to people.

Now, don't get me wrong, I fully believe that God can and does speak through His children - otherwise how would anyone believe unless everyone had access to the Bible and the Holy Spirit at every waking moment.  How can we believe unless someone tells us?  That's in the Word.

But people are NOT a substitute for the Word.

I asked so many people so many different times - so much so that they probably got so tired of me.  I could see it in their faces sometimes - to the point where I stopped asking the questions with some people and just wallowed in my lostness.  And that's what it was.  Lostness.  Now, again, don't get me wrong.  I KNOW that I am a child of God.  It has taken the past two years to make me certain of that again, but even in my lostness, I at least faintly knew that I still loosely believed.  My faith was likely as small and frantic as an electron circling the nucleus of an atom of a mustard seed (if there even is such a thing - I am an English teacher, after all), but it was there. 

Still, I was lost.  I was lost in a world without certainty.  I was lost in a world where I felt so alone and like there was no one to turn to.  My parents and in-laws are all ministers - what would they say to my loss of faith?  My sister had helped me in the past, but was I willing to open this up to her?  My brother, I knew, had his own struggles and I didn't want to be a hindrance to him. 

Thank God for my husband.  Although he has at many points been one of those who rolled his eyes at yet another moment of my questioning - he has always allowed God to speak through him, even if it took him a while to get to that point in the conversations.  He has been to me, his wife, exactly what a Godly husband should be.  But more on that later.

Still, I maintain my previous statement, people are NOT a substitute for the Word of God.

I've turned to books. 

Books written by Godly people who have had their own struggles.  In this past year or two, those have been Becoming a Woman of Faith by Cynthia Heald, A Sure Path by Susan S. Scott, Reckless Faith by Beth Guckenberger, and One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp.  Each, in their own way, about faith, which is what I knew I was lacking.  I have grown in faith by reading these books and they have helped me to see new things about God and my realtionship with Him

But, again, books are NOT substitutes for the Word of God.

I have also turned to music.

KLOVE, Air1, and any other Christian radio stations that grace the dial in my car as well as that in my iTunes and flowing from my church.  Especially when songs are about God, I can see Him and I can feel closer to Him.

But, again, music is NOT to be a substitute for the Word of God.

Somehow I always knew that the Bible was where I should turn and God was who I needed to seek, but I had begun to believe the lie that if I went there, all I would get would be condemnation.  All I would get would be a sentence.

See this?  Yeah, you're definitely lost.  Man, you are so lost.  Oh, and check out this sin I bet you didn't even know you had - you're a wreck.  And check out this other stuff in your head and your heart and your life.  You're such a terrible person, you can never fix all the things that are wrong with you!

And I was right - in part.

This afternoon I was talking with my husband about the idea of us beginning to take steps to become missionaries - something that has been growing in his heart as a desire and calling for the past 5 years and something that used to be very present in my heart as a calling and a passion, telling others about Christ.

But not anymore. 

Even before the past two years, I was still wandering in a place where I wondered if God really spoke to me still, if He really had a plan for me, if I could know what that was, if I was even worthy of it anymore. 

There's me again, believing the lie. 

Still, after such a long time of lostness - I had forgotten too many things to see the need for sharing Christ with others.  I knew this was a good thing, something Christians should do, but not only did I feel stale in this calling, I also felt stale in my relationship with Christ.  The more my husband spoke passionately about sharing Christ with others and the more he shared with me how genuine his belief in Christ and how ardent his faith, the more I felt my heart crying out I wish someone would share this Jesus with me - I want to meet this Jesus.  Like the retired pastor in Frank Perretti's novel The Visitation, I felt in my heart "I was saved, sanctified, born again, and Spirit-filled, but Jesus and I were strangers."

Again I asked the hard questions. 

Again, God spoke to me through my husband.  The following are answers my heart believes.  These are not just answers fed me by a loving husband, but answers whispered into my heart by a loving God through my husband, my books, my music, my experiences, and my seeking in scripture.  You see, God can use all these.  And He does.  But the Word is His living story.

*What's with the trinity?  Yes, God is the Father, the Son, the Holy Spirit, but all are God. 

The Father knew there was no way for us to be with Him, so he sent the Son.  The Son lived among us to show us who the Father truly was and to give us the opportunity to be like him, then died so that we could be fully made right with God if we accepted his sacrifice.  The Holy Spirit was sent to us, the believers, in order to help us understand and remember the Son's teaching and lead us to the Father, call us to be made right and follow the Son to the longest-lasting and most pure relationship we'll ever have.

*Why is Jesus so important?  He's the cure! 

I can read about my diagnosis all day in the Bible.  True, I am a wreck.  True, I do have sin that I don't even know is there.  True, there is absolutely nothing I can do to fix myself, no matter how long I try or how many methods I use to self-improve.  But if I read the Bible simply for it's diagnosis and not for the fact that Jesus came to fix me, to give me hope, to be my cure!  He is the one who will come and take his faithful home to be with him.

*Why is the Bible such a big deal?  The Bible isn't just another book, but THE book!

True, it does show us what is wrong in the eyes of God and it does show us why we'll never be able to come to God on our own merits.  But it's also the living story of God's love and promises shown through a multitude of generations and a man who died and lives and has the power and authority to give me freedom from anything and everything that can keep me from being the woman I was made to be... without understanding this, I have truly missed it.  Oh, Lord, have I missed it.

*What does a Christ-centered life really look like?  Just look at the lives of those who don't just profess to believe what the Bible says, but also LIVE it out!

My friends who are in Spain sharing the truth of the gospel, they are living it.  My friends and their large family living in the Horn of Africa and sharing what Jesus has done in their lives with the lost they meet, they are living it.  My loved ones leaving for India to build relationships with people they have never met in a country they have never more than visited in order to help people break free of the chains of a life lived by rules and traditions instead of the freedom of Jesus's sacrifice and love for us, they are living it.  And my dear, dear husband who shares with the broken women at his workplace through song and service and the small pod of young people in our young adults bible study group through the Word and the "random" people he comes into contact with that start asking the questions without realizing it...

and his lonely, questioning, frightened wife who feels safe asking him the hard questions and trusting that he knows the way to lead her back to the One who will always have the answers. 

*So do people really come to Jesus anymore?  Yes, oh, Lord, yes, they do.  How do I know?

Because I do. 

I do.

*Do I really know him and does he really know me?  Yes, He does.  And though I feel that I have before and I only now do in part, I am learning to know Him more and will seek to do so for the rest of my life. 

How?  By seeking him in the Bible - in the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke, John) where the men He ministered with share their experiences with Him - and share his words.  By seeking Him in prayer - asking Him my tough questions and believing Him for the truth to blot out all the lies.  By being obedient to do what he asks of me even when it's scary and I don't feel like I am the right one to be doing so.  He knows me.  He loves me.  That's why He died, that's why He lives, that's why He calls me to join Him, that's why He allows me to face the hard questions and wrestle through them for the blessing on the other side. 

I won't let go, Lord, I won't let go!

So now the answer to my oldest and scariest question...

*Have I been believing a lie?

Well, I must tell you that the answer is yes. 

Yes I have.

I have believed that God was not there and even if He was, He wouldn't speak to me and that was a lie.

I have believed that Jesus did and is doing nothing worthy of me sharing him with others - a tragic lie.

I have believed that I was lost in the midst of all my questioning and that He had left me - a blatant lie.

I have believed that I could magically draw closer to Him by talking to other people, listening to music, and reading odd books instead of seeking him in scripture and asking him for guidance - a candle-snuffing lie.

I have believed that the Bible was just another book and had no more power than to show me what I was doing wrong and give me more and more reasons why I am an unsalvageable wreck - a tormenting lie.

I have believed that God doesn't speak anymore, that Jesus doesn't save anymore, that the Holy Spirit doesn't move anymore -

lies, all wretched lies.

Our conversation ended with me praying to Jesus, my long-lost savior and my friend, my hope, my cure - confessing my spiritual Alzheimer's and forgetfulness, asking Jesus to remind me that I don't need to live a lie anymore - I don't need to live looking at my diagnosis, but blind to the freedom of His cure - that it's true that I am absolutely wretched and there is absolutely nothing I can do to fix myself, but THAT is why I so desperately need Him.  I asked Him to remind me who He was, bring me back from wandering so far off the road that I forgot the road entirely.  I asked Him to show me more and more who He was in scripture and in prayer and give me a passion and a boldness and an undeniable calling to follow Him.  I begged Him to let me not forget this.

I cried.

My husband had said before, during our conversation, that he could not figure out why he still felt such a growing calling to go and share Christ with the people of another country if it was not God's will - that he had been trying to be faithful in every circumstance that God gave him in the here and now, but knew more and more that if he - if we - didn't GO, it was disobedience.  I understood now.

I looked into his tear-swollen eyes, knowing they reflected my own, and said, "honey, maybe you just needed to share Him with me first."

He smiled, the tears welling again, and answered, "maybe I did...

maybe I did"

I'm sorry for the length and mess of this post.  I knew I needed to share it - not just for you, but for me.  We English/Writing teachers have a bit of a saying - If it isn't documented, it never happened.  I could not risk forgetting again.  Please hold me accountable to today.  Please help me to not forget. 

And please learn from my lostness, my wandering, my hard questioning.

The next time Satan tempts you to believe a lie, wrestle it out with God.  Ask Jesus the hard questions, beg for answers.  LOOK to Him.  Bend your eyes, your heart, your will, upward and pray.  Ask Him.  If you have believed in your heart that Jesus came for you, that there is no way that you can do anything to fix yourself or have a chance at saving yourself from the pits in life and the pit of Hell in death other than to trust in His sacrifice and surrender your life to Him, allowing Him to give you freedom - then continue to trust Him even when things don't make sense.  And believe me, there will come lonely, gut-wrenching times when things don't make sense.  Only Jesus can show you the way through all of the pain to all of the answers and even if it hurts to get there, it is SO worth it!

Press on to SEEK the Truth and STOP believing the lie!!

Being Prepared

Praise God; healing has come!  I have to say that the last few days were pretty brutal.  I honestly think the last time I had a fever was back when I lived at home with my parent, over 10 years ago.  I knew that I was really sick yesterday when my wife was hot in a sleeveless dress and I was freezing in a hoodie and jeans.

I felt much better upon waking this morning but I felt pretty good when I woke up yesterday also.  So I was careful to ease myself into work and pay close attention to how my body reacted.  I tried to go to work yesterday after feeling a little better in the morning and ended up back home curled up on the couch in misery by lunch time.  The moment I knew that I truly was on the path of recovery was when I ate lunch and desired a second helping of chips!  I have not been able to even finish half a sandwich, much less the chips, for the past two days.  I always know that something is wrong when I am not hungry ;)

I have a lot to do at my job and one of the pressing tasks is mowing the lawn.  After the fourth warmest winter on record, our grass is growing like crazy much earlier than usual.  I decided to mow today particularly because the zero-turn mower we use can be operated without much strength.  I knew this would help me get a lot of what I need to get done without completely exhausting me.

As I mowed the front yard of my business's property, I praised God for the ability to be outside.  I was so thankful to be productive again and so thankful for a beautiful day to return to.  Another reason I decided to mow today is because it is suppose to rain tonight, tomorrow, and Saturday.  I knew that if I allowed the grass to wait until Monday, our property would start taking the shape of a wilderness over a well manicured lawn.

In our lives, there are times when we can see storms coming.  When this happens, we have a choice to prepare for the storm or ignore the storm.  By preparing for the storm, we can minimize much of the damage or problems it could cause.  Yet by ignoring it, we can end up with a much worse situation than we could've predicted.  Like mowing the grass.  If I had waited, I may have ended up with swampy areas due to high rain, fallen trees due to high wind, and much taller grass due to water and sunlight.

Different examples of upcoming storms in our lives that may be preventable are: house repairs, car repairs, marital trouble, job issues, and/or family issues.  Many times we are given signs that any number of these issues are going to get worse if not attended to now.  We as Christians have to be careful by being aware of how we are living our lives and what storms we may be causing or walking into by our actions.  People are paying attention to how we live our life, which includes how we prepare for a storm and how we handle a storm.

As we look in the Bible, we can see that there are a whole plethora of scriptures that speak to us preparing for the storms in our lives.  There are hundreds of scripture speaking to how to handle money, relationships, jobs, friendship, and who to trust in.  By following these scriptures, we help to weather proof our life or at least minimize the damage from the storms that are sure to come.  Are you prepared for the storms that may be coming in your life and do you know who to trust as you go through them?      

Blessings,

Greg

My wife and I feel an intense calling on our lives for missions and full-time ministry.  We have created a fundraiser to help us overcome one hurtle to us being able to go to the mission field.  I pray that you will take a moment and check out this link.  I thank you for your consideration and ask that you seek the Lord's guidance in considering contributing to this fundraiser.  Thank you.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=3437&url=roadtofreedomforproclaimingchrist

A Battle Forseen

I've definitely had better days,  I'm not a pretty sight but it is what it is. ;)

There are times when you don't want to compete a task and then there are times that you can't.  Today was one of those times where I couldn't do anything today.  Literally.  I woke up in the middle of the night with difficulty breathing and finally got that under control after an hour or so.  Then I woke up with stomach flu/food poisoning like symptoms.  Let's just say that my day did not turn out at all like I had hoped it would.  As you read yesterday, I have an immense of amount of work that needs to be done both at home and work.

Well today, I was at the mercy of the sickness, which was waging a war with my body.  Though I believe my body will ultimately win, today was not that day.  It took me two hours before I had enough strength and stability to make it to the doctor.  Once I made it to the doctor, I had to wait three hours to be told I have a fever but not the flu or strep.  The gave me an antibiotic prescription and told me to go home, rest, and drink lots of liquids.  By the time I got home, I was hitting rock bottom physically.  I had not eaten or drank anything all day on top of the stomach flu like symptoms that ravaged my body in the morning.

After some much needed medicine and a small amount of food, I proceeded to spend the rest of my afternoon on the couch, praying for healing and a chance to work tomorrow.  Here I am still on the very same couch writing this blog now.  My body still aches, my stomach is only marginally cooperating, and I am trying to gauge whether I have the strength to attend one last Master Gardener class before our final test next week.

Sometimes when we do not allow ourselves to rest and de-stress, God allows our body to demand rest for us.  I in no way enjoy sickness but maybe this is exactly what I need at this time.  Is it weird to think that maybe my sickness was necessary today for some reason.  Maybe I am exactly where I need to be, doing exactly what I am, which is practically nothing except writing this blog.

I believe that God is sovereign in all areas of our life.  By making that statement, I have to include sickness also.  I in no way believe that this means you should never go to the doctor or take medicine.  I just believe that there is a purpose to my sickness.  John 9:1-7 brings this idea to light saying,

As he passed by, he saw a man blind from birth. ² And his disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”³ Jesus answered, “It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him. ⁴ We must work the works of him who sent me while it is day; night is coming, when no one can work.⁵ As long as I am in the world, I am the light of the world.” ⁶ Having said these things, he spit on the ground and made mud with the saliva. Then he anointed the man's eyes with the mud ⁷ and said to him, “Go, wash in the pool of Siloam” (which means Sent). So he went and washed and came back seeing.  

This man's ailment existed that God might be displayed in him.  I don't know about you but I find this reality sobering.

We live in a world where sickness, handicaps, and malformations are see as sin, screw ups, and  genetic imperfections.  A few weeks ago Brandt Hansen from the staff of Air1 had the opportunity to go to Afghanistan and be apart of the ministry called Cure International.  He got to witness them healing a 15 year old girl named Nazar, who suffered from a cleft palate.  Through this ministry, this young woman will be able to go from an outcast to an accepted person in society.  Even more than that though, she, her family, and her village will be ministered to through the compassionate work of this Christian organization.

Next time you find yourself laid out on the couch suffering from a sickness or pass a person with some sort of disease, malformation, or condition, take the time to consider how God is using it or them to bring glory to Himself.  Maybe His glory will be shown through your love to them.  Maybe His glory will be shown through you seeking Him in your suffering.  Each day is a gift from God, whether through sickness or health.  How will you shine for Jesus today?

Blessings,

Greg

My wife and I feel an intense calling on our lives for missions and full-time ministry.  We have created a fundraiser to help us overcome one hurtle to us being able to go to the mission field.  I pray that you will take a moment and check out this link.  I thank you for your consideration and ask that you seek the Lord's guidance in considering contributing to this fundraiser.  Thank you.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=3437&url=roadtofreedomforproclaimingchrist

The Battle Within

The highlight of my day.

Tonight, I am tired.  My wife and I have been working to redo our bedroom in the past few weeks.  Through this process, we moved everything out of the room and have been sleeping in the living room.  We try to work on our bedroom when we get a chance but honestly we are both exhausted when we get home.  I have been working on redoing and painting rooms at my job also, which makes it all the more difficult to want to do the same thing at home.

We both agree that we want the room to be done but do not want to rush back into our bedroom unfinished.  I don't know about you but when I feel overwhelmed with a task or tasks, I have a tendency to want to shut down.  I don't want to work anymore.  I want to get away from what is weighing heavy on me.

Well today was one of those days for me.  When I came into work this morning, I did not want to get started on the project I need to finish.  I didn't want to paint, trim, or tape the room I needed to work on.  There was a war within my heart against the very things I needed to do.  As I battled with the project before me, the Lord convicted me of why I needed to work anyways.  He laid on my heart that the job I do does not only affect people's perception of me but also Him.

I am to work for His honor and glory and sometimes that involves doing things that I may not want to do. I have to lean on His strength and endurance to push through the times I would rather collapse and give up.  I am not writing tonight that knowing this takes away all of my inner battles and struggles but knowing this does at least help me to do what is right despite those inner struggles.

I want my life to be a daily example of Jesus in me.  I want everything I do to be a reflection of His glory and power.  Though these last few weeks have been difficult and the growing pile of tasks I have before me will not be depleted soon, I will rest in my Lord's strength.  I will seek His peace.  And I will trust His Word.  The Bible says that Jesus' yoke is easy and His burden light (Matthew 11:28-30).  The Bible says that in Christ I can do all things (Philippians 4:13).  The Bible also says that I should not be wearied by this world because Jesus has overcome the world (John 16:33).  Lastly the Bible says that God will provide for all my needs through Jesus (Philippians 4:19).  In these scriptures, I will trust and through these scriptures, I will carry on.

Blessings,

Greg

My wife and I feel an intense calling on our lives for missions and full-time ministry.  We have created a fundraiser to help us overcome one hurtle to us being able to go to the mission field.  I pray that you will take a moment and check out this link.  I thank you for your consideration and ask that you seek the Lord's guidance in considering contributing to this fundraiser.  Thank you.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=3437&url=roadtofreedomforproclaimingchrist

A Piece of Me

At my job, we have chapel on Tuesdays for our clients and employees.  Today's chapel, was about our own stories that make up who we are.  The speaker did an activity where we wrote down one word descriptions of our story and linked them together.  It was so amazing to see how so many words written by others could apply to our own stories also.  By the end of the chapel, we had a multi-link chain of our life stories one word at a time.  The three words I used throughout the activity was grace, darkness, and redeemed.

My whole life has been covered by grace though I have to say there were times I wouldn't have been able to see it.  I am a preacher's kid.  I tell most people that I have been in the church since before I was born.  My family did a wonderful job of raising me with love, teaching me the Bible, who Jesus is, and how to live a life that honors Him.  I remember being at church every time the doors were open.  When I was a teenager, I would even run the sound for dad at some of the weddings and funerals performed at the church.

Though my parents did a wonderful job of raising me, they couldn't protect me from all of the temptations and sins of this world.  Many of the struggles I faced in my life were not due to a failure on their part but a lack of judgment and wisdom on my part.  There were just certain challenges I chose, pridefully, to face on my own.  I praise God that I never had any problems with alcohol or drugs but there were definitely areas I struggled with throughout my teenage years and beyond.  

I struggled greatly with being a "two face," which for me was living for Jesus when I was at church and home and then living for the world when I was not.  I was greatly immersed in secular music, tv, and practices most behind my parents back through the homes of friends around me.  I learned to cuss on the bus in kindergarden.  We went to a school system that had all ages on the same bus.  I struggled greatly with the language, stories, and concepts I learned on the bus and in school for essentially my whole time in school.  I look back and shutter at the things I said, thought, and did during those years in grade school.  It took me many years of submitting all these things to Jesus and changing what I allowed to filled my head and mouth.  The phrase, "garbage in equals garbage out" is so true.

During a move to a new town when I was around ten years old, I was introduced to pornography.  I essentially became addicted to this horrifying realm of the devil for my full teenage life and well into my twenties.  It did not help that my generation was the first to fully interact with the computer and a new thing called the internet.  I grew up in a time when parental controls were nonexistent on the computer and content was infinitely accessible.  This served to feed my curiosity and drew me deeper into darkness and sin than I ever wanted to go.  I suffered greatly from this time in my life and looking back I can see the pain I caused to myself, my family, my friends, and my wife.  

During those teenage and college years I continued my 'two face' living of portraying the perfect preachers son who had it all together while sinking deeper and deeper into sin behind locked doors.  The devil had a firm grip on my life and yet I thought that I was okay.  I could answer any Biblical question you gave me and I knew who Jesus is and what He did for me.  I believed I was saved and had "rededicated" my life many times to make sure.  My heart was so deceived and the devil had me believing  I could live for two worlds without consequences.  

Well about five years ago, God brought me to a place where I met a man who I refer to now as my brother.  The two of us were much alike in the struggles with sin we faced and our desire to be free from them to fully honor and minister for Jesus.  We instantly became best friends and accountability partners.  Through prayer, accountability, and a fervent resolve to vanquish the sin that was destroying our lives, we were able to begin the difficult and painful walk to freedom.  God's grace redeemed us.  He utilized our friendship to provide encouragement and tough talks when needed.  He taught us how to walk in Him through our times hiking, biking, boating, and talking deeply about His word and how He was working on our hearts individually.  Through this time, Jesus taught us both how to passionately love Him and live for fully live for Him.

There is so much more to my story and the many ways that God has moved through it but what I am most proud of is to be able to say that Jesus has brought me freedom from the bondage I once endured.  For the longest time, I believed that certain temptations and addictions could not be broken but must be endured for the full length of my life.  I now can see that Philippians 4:13 is true!  Psalm 103:12 is absolutely true!  God's promises are true! 

I honestly don't know where your heart is tonight.  Maybe you are the one who is tired of hearing about God and Jesus because you have been running from Him so long.  Maybe you are like I was and have been in the church your whole life and yet secretly you are up to your eyeballs in sin and finally ready to acknowledge that you are far from Jesus and want to ask Him in your heart for real.  Maybe you have been missing something your whole life and have just never knew how to fill that void.  Maybe you feel that you are just to gone for Jesus to love you.  

I am here to say that you can never run to far away from Jesus for Him to reach you.  You can never fall to far down for Him to be able to pick you up.  You can never sin to much to be redeemed.  Jesus' salvation is offered not because of what right you've earned but what He has freely given (Ephesians 2:8-9).  Jesus is waiting for you to open your heart to Him today (Revelation 3:20).  Jesus will give you the Holy Spirit, which will be there to guide you, teach you, and help you walk the road back to purity in Him (John 14:15-31).        

I felt I needed to offer part of my own story tonight.  There are many parts of it I am ashamed of and yet through these times of darkness I have found my Savior, a brother, and a strength I have never known.  Jesus truly can redeem all things for good for those who walk in Him (Romans 8:28).  I know He has for me and I look forward to how He will continue to allow me to minister and reach our to the world for Him.  I pray that if you do not know Jesus, you would accept Him today.  I pray that if you know Jesus but are mired deeply in sin, you would seek His forgiveness and begin a right and real relationship with Him today.  Please know that I am always willing to talk, pray, or help in anyway I can. 

Blessings,

Greg  

 

My wife and I feel an intense calling on our lives for missions and full-time ministry.  We have created a fundraiser to help us overcome one hurtle to us being able to go to the mission field.  I pray that you will take a moment and check out this link.  I thank you for your consideration and ask that you seek the Lord's guidance in considering contributing to this fundraiser.  Thank you.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=3437&url=roadtofreedomforproclaimingchrist

The Miracle of Life

Tonight, my wife and I had the opportunity to see the movie October Baby.  It was an incredible movie about a young woman who finds out she is adopted and not only that but that the physical complications she has are due to a failed abortion her mother had causing her to be born premature 24 weeks into the pregnancy.  The movie takes you on her journey to discover who she is, who her mother is, and how to deal with the circumstances of her life.  The movie is very well made and moving.  I highly recommend it to everyone.  It is well worth the money and time.

I have to admit that this movie profoundly affected me especially considering the fact that my wife is almost 24 weeks pregnant.  The shear evilness that would allow someone to take a moving, living, growing baby's life and destroy it with the belief that it is only a "bundle of tissues,"  is beyond what I can comprehend.  How arrogant we have to be to believe it is okay to take what God created and destroy it.  If this happens after the womb, we consider it tragic and call it murder but not in the womb because most of the world does not accept a fetus as life.

Throughout the time that my wife has been pregnant, I have been amazed by the glorious life that is growing within her.  My heart leaps with joy as I watch an ultrasound and see our little boy turning, moving, and bending in the womb.  My wife now feels him daily and even many times a day.  She is beginning to feel him respond in different ways to different situations and she is only 23 weeks along.

There is a human being inside her stomach.  All of his parts are formed and working and moving as they are intended.  He is swallowing amniotic fluid to practice his breathing.  I personally have seen his primary organs at work through the ultrasound.  I have seen his heart fluttering, the blood flowing to his little extremities and brain.  I marvel each day at the miracle God is performing in the belly of my wife.

I love how this movie's intention is healing both for the child, the mother, and the nurse of the abortion clinic.  I love how this movie even supports adoption as a way to provide a seemingly unwanted life with loving parents who both want and are so happy to welcome this life into their family.  This movie is about redemption, forgiveness, and restoration.  There is a part where the main character is speaking to a priest and he comments about Paul's words on being able to forgive because of the forgiveness Jesus has given us.  He was speaking of Colossians 3:13 saying, "bearing with one another and, if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive."  


Abortion is, in my opinion, one of the most heinous acts humanity performs.  It perpetuates nothing but brokenness, selfishness, and a flagrant disrespect of God's creation.  I know that the right to choice and the right to life are still a hot topic in our country today but I hope that you will fight for life.  I in no way advocate the acts of violence many people have carried out in their hatred of abortion.  I believe that we should fight the atrocities of abortion through prayer, advocacy of truth, and petitions of our government.  It is our place to love people to change, healing, and understanding.  It is our place to lead people to healing, both those considering abortion and those who have had or performed an abortion, through the redeeming power of Jesus Christ.  


Please don't sit on the sideline another day on this issue.  Take the time to watch October Baby.  Take the time to check out their website and learn how you can get involved in the fight for life today.  


Blessings,


Greg 

My wife and I feel an intense calling on our lives for missions and full-time ministry.  We have created a fundraiser to help us overcome one hurtle to us being able to go to the mission field.  I pray that you will take a moment and check out this link.  I thank you for your consideration and ask that you seek the Lord's guidance in considering contributing to this fundraiser.  Thank you.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=3437&url=roadtofreedomforproclaimingchrist

Frozen Creek

Snow Angel on ice layer above creek

Walking along on a frozen creek

Proof of our time on the creek ;)

This winter has been the warmest on record in many places across the nation.  I have to say that I have greatly enjoyed the mild weather and low amount of snow and ice precipitation.  Financially this winter has been wonderful for heating bills and snow removal maintenance.  All in all it has been a pain free and quick winter but this is not usually the case for Central Indiana.

About four years ago, I remember a winter that stayed so cold for a long enough period of time that the large creek by our house froze solid to about 4-5 inches thick in most places.  My friend and I had a great time exploring the nature preserve near our houses where we were able to walk almost a mile on the solid ice of the creek.  It was so incredible that the ice stayed solid enough for us to do this.  It was so neat to see the moving water below the ice.  We truly had a "walking on water" experience that day.

This morning my pastor preached about faith and spoke of a winter where it was cold enough to snow mobile across lakes and even cold enough for small cars such as VW Beetles to drive on the ice.  He talked about this time in relation to faith.  Indeed standing, walking, or driving on ice requires a act of faith.  We have all heard many stories of people who fell through ice and died.  My pastor went on to say that there were two ways to cross the frozen lake.  The first was to cross the lake in fear and trepidation of falling through the ice and the second was to cross the lake in faith that the ice would hold and by doing so being able to enjoy the wonderful nature of the crossing you were doing.

I can relate to his story because there were times that I was the one who was worried about the ice when my friend and I walked a mile on the creek.  In the beginning of our adventure, I carefully analyzed the color of the ice, listened closely for cracking sound, and watched my friend carefully to make sure he was safe on the ice.  My friend on the other hand did not worry about the ice at all but in fact had fun dancing, sliding, jumping, and even making snow angels on the ice.  He was truly able to enjoy the adventure and blessings of such a strange weather anomaly in central Indiana.  As the trip went on I too was finally able to relax and enjoy our adventure.

Life is the same as these two stories.  We can choose to walk through this life in fear of what will happen to us next or we can put our complete faith in God that He will will protect and guide us.  I understand that all the realist reading this post are saying that there is a difference between faith and ignorance and I would agree.  We have to be very careful though in our thinking on faith and ignorance because though we do understand that certain ice situations are very dangerous and should never be attempted faith or not, we have to be extremely careful not to put God in a box of what is possible in this world for our lives.  Do not forget as it says in Ephesians 3:20, "Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think." 

Our God will never steer us into a place of danger without a purpose.  He will always be with us and we can always rest assure that there is peace in being in the center of His will.  Also at church today our pastor spoke of a man who lost his life in Iraq on thursday.  He had been teaching at a private Christian school in Iraq for the last seven years when a student came in with a gun and killed him this past week.  Though it is easy to hear this story and think of the tragedy of the story, let's not forget that this man chose to go into danger by teaching in Iraq because he felt called there by the Lord.  This man was able to minister to and teach over 500 kids in the time he was there.  A memorial was done for this man in a mosque in Iraq, which is the first time in known history that a foreigner non-muslim was given a memorial in a mosque in Iraq.  Also many of his students changed their Facebook profile picture to this man's picture as a tribute.


I think it can be said that this man's impact will continue well past his death and that possibly through his death many more will come to know Jesus as Lord and Savior.  For all of these things to happen, complete faith was required from this man.  We have to remember that our lives are to be lived for God's glory and not our own.  We are living for eternal things and not the finite things of this world.  I hope today that you will choose to live boldly, filled with faith and assurance, for Jesus today.


Blessings, 


Greg   

My wife and I feel an intense calling on our lives for missions and full-time ministry.  We have created a fundraiser to help us overcome one hurtle to us being able to go to the mission field.  I pray that you will take a moment and check out this link.  I thank you for your consideration and ask that you seek the Lord's guidance in considering contributing to this fundraiser.  Thank you.

http://www.youcaring.com/fundraiser_details?fundraiser_id=3437&url=roadtofreedomforproclaimingchrist

Trail of Devastation

Me examining and trying to find anything worth saving in my sister's car, which I owned first, after a devastating F4 tornado tore through Union University in Jackson, Tennessee in February 2008.

Having a sister that survived a F4 tornado four years ago, I ask that you pray for all those affected by the tornadoes in these last few days.  You cannot imagine the devastation, the power, or the life changing turmoil created by these massive funnels of catastrophe, until you have lived through one.  I only partially understand the suffering the people who encountered tornados today may be experiencing, through eyes and stories of my sister.

I arrived at her campus just one day after the tornado tore through the town of Jackson Tennessee.  I have never seen cars crushed and smashed in such a way.  I have never seen walls splintered to pieces, roofs gone, and debris so scattered before. As we waited to get the few items my sister owned not destroyed by the storm, I looked at all the stone-faced and shocked people grouped together.  Most of the people I saw that day were numb and just trying to process whether the events of the last 24 hours were real or just a dream.

I praise God each day that He chose to spare my sister and the 1000+ others who were on the campus that day.  I have developed a greater love, appreciation, and closeness with my sister because of that event just four years ago.  She is so precious to me and through that event I learned to never take life for granted especially with the ones you love.  I have a small glimpse into what the people who lived through the tornado events today are going through and yet I know so little about how they truly feel.

Please pray for peace and comfort tonight for each person who experienced a tornado or is a friend or family member to someone who experienced a tornado in the last few days.  Please pray for provision for them.  Pray for loving support to surround them.  Pray that they would be able to find peace that passes understanding in their souls after experiencing something so incredibly frightening.

Blessings,

Greg

He Refreshes my Soul

My day was long and, at times, frustrating.  I find that I am not quite as cheerful or patient when I am sick.  I do not seem to have very much tolerance for things not going as I expected and I don't handle multiple tasks very well.  By the grace of God, I was able to survive this day though I probably could've benefitted from another day resting and healing in bed.  As I prepare for bed tonight, I think of Psalm 23 and it gives me peace.  The Lord is with me always no matter how I feel and is watching over me.  Indeed tonight I am going to let Him lead me by still waters and refresh my soul.  I hope you all have a blessed and safe day tomorrow.  I leave you with the 23rd Psalm saying,

 ¹ The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
 ² He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
 ³ he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
   for his name’s sake.
⁴ Even though I walk
   through the darkest valley,^[a]
I will fear no evil,
   for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
   they comfort me.

 ⁵ You prepare a table before me
   in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
   my cup overflows.
⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
   all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
   forever.

Blessings,

Greg

Good and Perfect Gift

I have learned in the past four days that sickness is an excellent reminder of the blessings of good health.  I have by no means enjoyed the snotting, the coughing, the chest pain, the body aches, or the nights of little if any sleep.  I have especially not appreciated the missed work days and missing the class I am taking.  In these times I feel so useless and broken.  I wonder if I will wake up healed or if the sickness will become worse.  With my wife being pregnant, I do my best not to infect her though I want to hold her and feel comfort by having her close to me.  Needless to say, I do not like being sick.

The thing is though that in my sickness I am dependent upon healing and comfort from God.  Yes we have doctors, medicines, home remedies, and more to help our sickness heal but ultimately our health is in His hands.  This was never more true than last night when I could feel my heart beating out of my chest due to the cold medicine I took.  I had taken this medicine in the hopes that it would give me sleep not keep me awake most of the night wondering if I was going to die.

Now I do have to admit that at times I have hypochondriac tendencies and that in no way helps to comfort your mind as you lay in bed feeling your heart beat through your chest and in your arm.  I finally got up and called the pharmacist to see if what I was experiencing was normal or something that needed medical attention.  He assured me that my symptoms where normal from this drug and that it would stop as the medicine wore off.  Well three and a half hours later at around 2:30 in the morning I think I finally fell asleep only to be awoke at 7:30 for my first full day of work this week.

Last night I had no other option but to trust God with my life.  When we are healthy and life is good, work is going well, and the bills are getting paid, we have this false assurance that we are in control of our life.  It is amazing how a simple cold can remind us of the humbling reality that our lives are in God's hands and that we are fully dependent upon His grace to continue sustaining our lives.  Psalm 39:4-6 is sobering saying,
⁴ 


4 O Lord, make me know my end
    and what is the measure of my days;
    let me know how fleeting I am!
⁵ 5 Behold, you have made my days a few handbreadths,
    and my lifetime is as nothing before you.
Surely all mankind stands as a mere breath! Selah
⁶ 6    Surely a man goes about as a shadow!
Surely for nothing they are in turmoil;
    man heaps up wealth and does not know who will gather!


James 4:14 says, "Yet you do not know what tomorrow will bring. What is your life? For you are a mist that appears for a little time and then vanishes." 


I do not speak of these things to be morbid but to remind us of the wonderful blessing of life and health.  Each day we wake up is a blessing from God.  Each day is an opportunity to reach a life for the kingdom.  Each day is an opportunity to praise the one who has given you life.  Though I am still healing from the cold that started a few days ago, I have been reminded to appreciate the blessings in my life.  In James, it speaks of every good and perfect gift coming from God.  This evening the thought crossed my mind that even sickness could be considered a good and perfect gift if it directs your heart back to a love and dependance on the sovereignty of God.  Food for thought. 


Blessings,


Greg